Who’s Throwing The Babies Into The River?

America’s opioid problem
America’s opioid problem is getting worse.

Despite feeling blindsided, most of us now know that we are living in the midst of an unprecedented drug epidemic. According to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services (HHS), since 1999, the rate of overdose deaths including prescription pain relievers, heroin and synthetic opioids such as fentanyl, nearly quadrupled.

Some of the steps taken to save lives include improving prescribing practices and expanding access to medication-assisted treatment and the use of Naloxone.
Medication-assisted treatment combines talk therapy and medications such as methadone or buprenorphine to treat opioid addiction. Through affordable, accessible and quality care people can recover and go on to live productive lives.

Naloxone is used to treat a narcotic overdose in an emergency situation by reversing the effects of opioids, including slowed breathing or loss of consciousness.

Notwithstanding the increased attention to lifesaving measures, there is less focus on the devastating impact of addiction on children living in families where a parent is addicted to drugs or alcohol.

Perhaps nothing drove home the reality of America’s opioid problem more than the recent photo taken in Ohio of two overdosed adults spread out in the front of a car, while one of their young grandsons looked on from the back seat.

There are more than 8 million children younger than 18 years of age that are growing up in homes with alcohol and other drug-abusing parents. These young people are likely to become alcohol or drug abusers themselves without intervention.

Parental alcoholism and drug addiction influence the use of alcohol and other drugs in several ways including increased stress and decreased parental monitoring.

Children who grow up with an addicted parent learn to distrust to survive. When unpredictability dominates a child’s life, he or she is likely to be wary, always sensing disappointment lurking nearby.

Children growing up with an addicted parent become uncomfortably accustomed to living with chaos, uncertainty and instability. When a child grows up under these conditions, they learn to guess at what normal is, with no road map to assist them.

Denial, secrecy, embarrassment and shame are common experiences of children who live with an addicted parent. Even seeking help outside of the family might in itself be seen as an act of betrayal, a step toward revealing the family secret.

Children who grow up with an addicted parent live with an unspoken, emotionally numbing mandate—don’t talk, don’t trust, don’t feel.

Growing up with an addicted family member leaves one with little hope that things will ever change; unless we take steps to change it. I am reminded of a parable about the small village on the edge of a river.

One day a villager saw a baby floating down the river. He jumped in the river and saved the baby. The next day he saw two babies floating down the river. He and another villager dived in and saved them. Each day that followed, more babies were found floating down the river. The villagers organized themselves, training teams of swimmers to rescue the babies. They were soon working around the clock.

Although they could not save all the babies, the rescue squad members felt good and were lauded for saving as many babies as they could. However, one day, one of the villagers asked: “Where are all these babies coming from? Why don’t we organize a team to head upstream to find out who’s throwing the babies into the river in the first place!”

Mobilizing resources to pull babies from the river, while neglecting the ones left behind makes no sense.

Andrew Malekoff is the executive director of North Shore Child & Family Guidance Center, which provides comprehensive mental health services for children from birth through 24 and their families. 

Visit www.northshorechildguidance.org for more information.

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