The Annoying Mom Advice Column: Overprotective Mom and H.E.L.P.

Hi Michelle,

I am a mom of three adult sons, ages ranging from 29 to 36. I still worry about them the same way I did when they were younger. I text them frequently, especially on the weekends. My two oldest boys get very angry with me, however, the youngest tolerates it. When I tell them to drive safely I get an answer like, “Mom, really? No, I’m not going to drive safely.” Then I get an eye roll. They get really annoyed when I get overprotective. I guess being that I always was overprotective, it kind of irritates them now. Please, some advice to help fix this problem.

Sincerely,
Overprotective Mom

Dear O.P.M.,

I can understand that a mom will always be concerned and worried about her children. However, you need to take a different approach. You are dealing with adult men. It is you that needs to control your actions. You need to realize that your sons do not want to feel like you are treating them like children. You need to cut back on the texting and calling and they will respect your concern in a much better way. Let your sons know that what you do is not due to anything that they are doing, but to your own way of handling things, which you are going to work on. Let them know that you were not happy with how you made them feel. Not only will they appreciate you saying that, but you are showing them that it’s never to late to learn. Realize that you raised intelligent young men who will do the right thing. Now take a deep breath and start working on making some changes.

……………

Hi Michelle,

I am at my wits end with my daughter. She is 24 years old and still lives at home. She has a bachelor’s degree in science and a master’s degree. She’s a good kid and never gives us a problem. But when she dresses to go out on the weekends with her friends, my husband and I think she dresses inappropriately. She keeps herself in great shape, but sometimes her outfits are just too sexy. Whenever I or my husband (her dad) say something, her answer to us is “I’m 24, I know how to dress,” or “This is how all my friends dress, this is the style.” I could use some advise on how to handle this situation.

Thank you and help!

Dear H.E.L.P.,

I’m sure that yes, your daughter does know how to dress as she says. But, you can have a one-on-one talk with her about how dressing too provocative or too sexy can send off the wrong signals. Let her know that she always looks beautiful and you are so proud of her in more ways than one. As far as the dressing goes, let her know that she can still look beautiful and sexy without having to flaunt her body, and to always conduct herself as a lady with elegance and class.

As a mom to a 29-year-old daughter and 26-year-old son, Weinberger is no stranger to parenting. She is the creator of the brand and the author of the parenting book Mom You’re So Annoying!, which is based on the many hats a mom wears. She lives in Bellmore. Email michelle@momyouresoannoying.com or visit www.momyouresoannoying.com.

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In addition to its arts and entertainment publication Long Island Weekly, Anton Media Group publishes 16 community newspapers, several magazines, specialty publications and websites. With brands dating back to 1877, Anton has a commitment to deliver trusted and relevant content to the communities it serves.

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